Checkmate, Mr. Eko

Last night, I sat myself down for a heaping helping of Lost. It was the two-hour season 4 finale, and it was indeed gratifying! I've found myself letting this show sneak into my all-time top five, and it might even be competing with Twin Peaks for coolest TV show in the history of the world.
I know that there are a lot of haters out there. Lots of people who think the show is "overrated" or who have been known to say, "I just couldn't get into it." I have but one thing to say to such haters: "Pull your heads out of your collective asses!" I know that these haters only rag on the show because it's mainstream and popular, and to certain forms of life, anything that is mainstream and popular must be sucky. Though that can be said about many things (cough cough...Indy 4...cough cough), there are TV shows, movies, books, and music that completely deserve all the popularity they get. Lost is a good example of this anomaly.
Now, in honor of the season finale, I give you my ten most extreme Lost moments:

10. Nathan Fillion: Lost has had its share of contributors. Many actors/actresses have come and gone throughout the twisted tale of Oceanic 815. But none so cool as Mr. Fillion. He appeared during one of Kate's flashbacks as Kevin Callis, a man that Kate was dating and eventually married! This was an awesome moment because Nathan Fillion is, himself, awesome. I was excited to see him pop up and do his thing for Lost, and it gave me another reason to be bugged by Kate, who leaves him behind in pursuit of her personal demons. Anyone who dumps Mr. Fillion is kind of a moron, in my opinion.

9. Penny and Desmond: I think a lot of people get caught up in the love triangle among Jack, Kate, and Sawyer, but I kinda got tired of thinking about who Kate should end up with. Instead, I liked to focus on the other relationships on the Island. Sun and Jin are cool, Sayid and Nadia are cool but tragic, Hurley and Libby were cute but kind of weird, etc. But the coolest relationship of all is that of Penny and Desmond. I thought they had a good thing going in previous seasons, but there were two episodes of season 4 that made me want them to live happily ever after. First was in the episode called "The Constant" when Desmond fell victim to an involuntary bout with time travel. The past form of Daniel Faraday told him that he had to find some kind of anchor that would keep his mind from spinning out of control, and that anchor was Penny. He managed to make arrangements in the past so that he could call Penny in the future, thus preserving his sanity. The second moment took place in last night's finale, when they finally came upon Penny's boat and the two were totally reunited. This was extra cool because I was pretty sure that Desmond was going to die somehow.

8. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42: These numbers are present throughout the show, and stuff like this intrigues me. Hurley is the one who seems to be most involved with these numbers, mainly because he thinks they are cursed. The reason for this is because he played these numbers in a lottery and won. As a result, he was on the plane that crashed and from then on he noticed them in strange places all over the Island. Wanna know what's even more crazy? Before he won the lottery, he heard someone mumbling about these numbers while he was in a mental institution. The person he heard mumbling ended up being a soldier who intercepted them in a longwave transmission while stationed at a military listening post. Most recently, Hurley encountered the numbers on the odometer of a car that his dad restored for his birthday. What???

7. "Not Penny's Boat": The season 3 finale was pretty awesome. Many things made it awesome. One of the more exceedingly awesome events took place when Charlie drowned. Charlie made contact with the freighter that was offshore, and made the startling discovery that it wasn't one of Penny's. As soon as he made this discovery, the crazy Russian Other swam by and shot out the window, causing water to rush in. Since Charlie couldn't get out, his last moments were spent writing the words "not Penny's boat" on his hand so he could show Desmond through the door's window. Though I'm not sure Charlie had to let himself die, it made the concept of finding out who the freak was sending freighters after them pretty intriguing.

6. Move the Island? What?: One of the more significant instances of mindfudgery that took place last night was the event in which Ben teleported the entire Island somewhere that has yet to be specified. That's really all I can say about it.

5. What's a Flash Forward?: Yet another instance of WTF from the season 3 finale. So, all through the show, there's been these flashbacks involving all of the characters and building up their stories. In the season 3 finale, we see one of these depicting Jack as a drug-addled misanthrope sporting an awesomely ugly beard. At first, you figure this is just a dark point in Jack's past and that it'll reveal something significant. But as the episode ends, freaking Kate drives up to meet him outside an airport. They start talking, and Jack's all "Kate! We have to go back! We weren't supposed to leave! Beard! Drugs!" The shock was so vicious that I was comatose for at least two days.

4. The Swan: During season 2, Locke was out hunting boars or something when he discovered something metallic buried in the ground. He dug around it and discovered that it was a door that led to an underground hatch. He showed his discovery to pretty much everyone, but Hurley freaked out when he noticed the cursed lotto numbers engraved on the door, so he ran off. Eventually everyone but Locke lost interest in the hatch, but there was this moment when he was lying on top of the door looking downwards through the window. Suddenly, Locke's face becomes illuminated as an unknown party flips on a light somewhere downstairs. It's moments like these that present the sense of wonder and fascination with the unknown that has become the core of the Lost universe.

3. Claire and the Psychic: I wanna start this off by saying that I hate Claire. But there was an instance in her back story that still freaks me out. Since she was gonna have a kid out of wedlock and all, she was thinking about adoption. But one day her friend persuaded her to visit a psychic. When he took Claire's hands to look into the future, he gets all disturbed and repeats, "No one but you can raise this baby." Claire is weirded out, but kind of trusts this guy's visions. So a few days later, the psychic dude contacts her, apologizes, and says that he knows a family in California who will take care of her baby. He gives her a plane ticket, and guess what? It's for Oceanic Flight 815, fated to crash on the mysterious Island. Now, the reason why this moment is number 3 on the list is because freaking Kate has Claire's baby! This psychic revelation still has some significance as to what's in store for future seasons.

2. Episode 1: I believe I've already mentioned the haters. The haters who have seen the first episode and weren't totally swept up in some of the craziest stuff to have ever been broadcast on national TV. Personally, if you watch the first episode of Lost and are not totally awed by it's two-fisted awesome, then you must have had a frontal lobotomy. Or maybe some form of traumatic head injury. It starts off with an intense plane crash, complete with explosions, shards of debris, and screaming passengers. Then, five minutes after Jack gets everyone calmed down, they start hearing really loud and eerie noises emanating from the jungle. A bit longer into the episode, the pilot gets yanked off screen by some unseen beast, and showers the wreckage with blood. And then? Polar bears! How can you not see all this stuff and say, "my life will not be complete until I figure out what's happening on this island." How?

1. Jacob: The revelation of this character was among the most creepifying moments ever caught on film. I think it takes place in season 3 when Locke decides to stay with the Others and learn more about the Island. Ben takes Locke to this dilapidated cabin surrounded by a ring of sand or ash. When Locke asks what they're doing, Ben explains that they're going to meet a man named Jacob. So they enter the cabin. It appears to be uninhabited, but after a few minutes, the furniture starts to shake and a voice that sounds like it was pulled directly from the Black Lodge moans, "Help me." Yeesh. I still get chills thinking about that shiz.

And there it is. Way to go, Lost. Way to not suck.

Growing Up Sucks.

I know that many of you have probably not seen the new Indiana Jones movie (a bunch of us went to see a midnight show early this morning), so if you want to be surprised and stuff, maybe it's a good idea to skip over this entry until you've seen it.

For those of you who are still here, let me rap with you for just a minute. I'm going to assume that most of you have a special place in your hearts for the Indiana Jones trilogy (even Temple of Doom in its awesome suckiness). I also think that I wouldn't be too far off when I assume that this special place is also home to the original Star Wars trilogy. For me, these six movies defined what it meant to watch a bona-fide adventure movie. As a kid watching them, I remember getting entirely swept up in the story, the characters, and the locales; and as an adult re-watching them, I feel like they have withstood the test of time. Even cooler is the ability they have to remind me of a childhood in which I made many happy memories for myself by letting these movies capture my imagination.
Obviously, with this kind of geek incubation, I was super excited when, way back in the day, George Lucas announced the creation of three new Star Wars movies that take place before the originals. The prospect of revisiting old characters and discovering new ones within a universe that I revered and loved made me get all warm and fuzzy inside. Finally, the day came when Episode I hit theaters. My friends and I camped in line with a hundred other equally excited geeks and spent the night debating the modifications to the "special edition" trilogy and arguing about which manifestation of Princess Leia was hotter. The little nerdy kids in us were back in control.
Then Episode I had to completely suck. Darth Maul provided a modicum of badass, but only enough to demonstrate what might have been. Even as a high school student with a heavy bias towards anything that had to do with lightsabers and TIE fighters, I felt a bit disappointed. Though Episodes II and III were better than the first, they're still pretty awful. How could the original trilogy be so awesome and timeless while the new trilogy reached new levels of banality? I have deliberated on this question for some time, and I think the answer is this: George Lucas has sold his soul to Satan. Gone are the days when his passion for filmmaking alone fueled him through the difficulties and naysaying that plagued him during production of the original trilogy. The new trilogy is a perfect reflection of something great that has made an unholy bargain with Evil in order to make a quick buck. They're soulless, trite, and were only successful because of the legions of geeks who found solace on the Millennium Falcon as little nerdlings. We were all exploited, and something sacred has been profaned.

Such is the case with Indy 4. The little excited kid in me was viciously kicked in the teeth as one of my all time greatest movie heroes pranced around like a poorly animated cartoon character. Though at times the movie veered close to its original ass-kicking territory, it was mostly just painful and sad. After close to twenty years of time to write something awesome for Indy, we get this load of sci-fi garbage?
After having this one last hope dashed, I have come to realize that Lucas and Spielberg have officially allied themselves with the Sith by sacrificing some of their best work to the dark gods of CGI, box office revenue, and merchandising.

Hopefully this will cheer us up:

You Can Make a Difference!

Okay, this might be an exercise in futility, but how many of you know who Uwe Boll is? I'm sure most of you do. First, he looks like this. Second, and probably most important, he directs extremely awful and terrifyingly crappy movies. Third, all of his movies have been based on sub-par video games.
The reason I'm posting this is because I stumbled upon an online petition that people can sign in order to get Mr. Boll to stop making movies. Apparently the obnoxiously overconfident director has claimed that if the petition racks up one million names, he will retire (so far, names on the list are in the neighborhood of 274,000). Anywho, here's the link to said petition. If you're a fan of video games, horror, or just movies in general, you know that Uwe Boll must be stopped at all costs. Sign the petition, and tell your friends to sign it. In the name of good taste, free refills, and the future of our children, it's time to mobilize against such tyranny.

Thank you.

Cool Stuff This Week

Over the past week I have been fortunate to partake of some cool things. I would like, if I may, to share some of these cool things with you.

Cool Thing #1: Iron Man
Why It's Cool: I'm talking about the new movie starring Robert Downey, Jr. and directed by Jon Favreau (he's so money, he doesn't even know it). Sheree wrote a fine piece about how awesome this movie was, and since I pretty much always agree with her (because we're so compatible. Not because I'm scared of her), I found it to be quite bad ass. I've always secretly liked Iron Man. I mean, I've never bought any Iron Man comics or anything, but he was one of my favorite characters to play as in Marvel Ultimate Alliance on my once again defunct xbox 360 (that's twice, dammit!). I'm pretty sure I used him, Blade, Deadpool, and Dr. Strange to whoop Dr. Doom's ass at the end. So I respect the man.
I also respect that he's an alcoholic womanizer who becomes noble after a near-death experience involving terrorists. Given that backstory, Robert Downey, Jr. was perfect to play the part. He's good looking, charismatic, and--most important--deeply fractured. I'm glad the movie embraced these qualities of Tony Stark and built off of them. Getting to the core of a character who decides to adopt another persona and fight crime is extremely important to a comic book-inspired movie. In fact, I would argue that the comic book movies that have utterly sucked(Ghost Rider, Daredevil, Batman & Robin, Fantastic Four, X-Men 3) did so because they neglected to dig into the primary character. With comics, there's always a lot more going on beneath the hero's exterior. It's more than just action sequences and CGI.

Cool Thing #2: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
Why It's Cool: It's a hyperactive spin on the lives of twentysomething hipsters that is heavily influenced by video games, anime, and indie music. Scott Pilgrim is just 23 year old dude who is in a moderately cool band called "Sex Bob-Omb." His life gets messed up when he meets this chick named Ramona Flowers who randomly shows up in his dreams. When they finally meet, Scott is dating a high school girl named Knives Chau who he must break up with in order to hook up with the rollerblading bohemian queen Ramona. But that's not all. In addition to breaking an unstable girl's heart, Scott must now battle Ramona's seven evil ex-boyfriends in order to secure Ramona as his girlfriend.
I've read three volumes of this tale, and have found it to be quite amusing. Scott's battles with Ramona's ex-boyfriends merge the boundaries of everyday hipster life with insane and frenetic Japanese fighting games (such as Street Fighter 2 and Tekken). What I'm really liking about this series is that at the heart of the manic and ridiculous battles, the author (Bryan Lee O'Malley) touches on some important ideas about love, commitment, and the amount of baggage people are stuck with after being dumped.

Cool Thing #3: The Frenchy Salad
Why It's Cool: The Frenchy is this salad they make at Toasters, which is a sandwich place across the street from the Salt Palace. I've been going to Toasters for awhile, since it's not far from my work, and it's really good food. Lately, I've been trying to eat less lard and more vegetables, and Toasters has aided me in this process. The Frenchy is an amazing accomplishment in the medium of saladsmithing. At it's core, it's just lettuce, tomatoes, and cucumbers. But the awesome Feta vinaigrette dressing coupled with the big chunks of Swiss and Provolone cheese are what make this salad so good that it deserves to be on a list with Iron Man and Scott Pilgrim.

Cool Thing #4: Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow
Why It's Cool: I know that this Nintendo DS game is quite old, but I have started to replay it recently, and it's so freaking sweet. Ever since our old 8-bit NES system, I have had a soft spot in my heart for the Castlevania games (except for the N64 ones. They just felt wrong to me). In this particular installment, you play a dude (who actually looks like a chick) named Soma Cruz. Soma was introduced in Aria of Sorrow, which was on the GBA (also pretty cool). You assault Dracula's castle armed with a dagger and your ability to consume the souls of the monsters you fight in order to use their abilities.
I won't go on about the storyline, but it's important that you know how awesome Castlevania games are.

Cool Thing #5: Kick-Ass
Why It's Cool: As if the name didn't say it all! Yes, this is another comic book that is cool (what can I say? It's been a good week for comics). As far as the story goes, it's another tale about a dorky teenager who dons a homemade costume to try his own luck at fighting crime. The cool thing about this one is the writer (Mark Millar. He wrote Civil War which was rad) has chosen to place his character into situations that I think are more authentic than the generic superhero fare. No supervillains, just everyday taggers and Puerto Rican gangs. On his fist venture to stop crime, Kick-Ass is brutally beaten and stabbed. Second time? He gets hit by a car. Despite the brutality, it's pretty damn funny. I promptly added it to my list of titles for my subscription box at Night Flight Comics!




Cool Thing #6: Iron Sky
Why It's Cool: just watch this super awesome trailer. I have no idea if this movie will see the shores of Utah, but it looks wicked.

Where Do You Keep Your Coffin?

Those of you who are super-observant may notice that I have added a super-sweet poll to my blog! Let me enlighten you as to its purpose.
It all started when I was a little kid, maybe around 7 or 8 years old. I had what some may call an "early exposure to violent horror films at a young age." I vividly remember watching movies such as The Fly, House, Nightmare on Elm Street, and The Lost Boys which, having re-watched them since, I found to be way too messed up for a little tyke such as myself. Among this plethora of monsters and madmen, one particular film stands out to me. This movie was about as influential on my developing psyche as The Wizard of Oz and Follow That Bird. This movie was called... Fright Night! I suspect that most of you have seen it (since I either grew up in the same house with you or have sat you down and forced you to watch it with me).
It's about this snot-nosed, horny teenager named Charley Brewster who notices that all of these strange murders have coincided with the appearance of a his new neighbor, Jerry Dandridge. Being the paranoid horror movie geek that he is, he starts spying on his neighbor and his encounters with the local escort service. He sees that Jerry has fangs and abnormally long fingers, which immediately tips him off. The thing that sucks is that Jerry now knows that Charley knows about him. So, the movie is about how Charley chooses to deal with the situation. He goes to the cops, but makes the foolish mistake of telling them that a vampire is living next to him, which (duh) no one believes. He ends up enlisting the help of Peter Vincent (he's kinda like Peter Cushing from the old Hammer Dracula movies) who hosts a TV show called "Fright Night" (ironic, isn't it?) to help him battle Jerry and his undead manservant.
Anywho, it's a pretty awesome movie. I think that I must have watched it fifty or so times as a kid. I can't really say why this particular horror movie didn't freak me out to the point of tears like so many others, but I remember liking it for that reason. It was like a safe foray into a world that terrified and fascinated me.
Plus, the soundtrack is kind of awesome. If anybody knows where I can find it, that would be righteous.

Speaking of music, I just got Portishead's new album. The only thing that I can really say about it is this: It's a collection of songs that you have always wanted to hear, and eleven years was far too long to wait for such awesomeness.

Oh, and this semester is finally over! Shit yeah!